Today was not easier...in fact it was harder. Every day that passes it is expected of me to be a little bit better. I am expected to be a little bit happier, a little bit less emotional, a little less tearful. Every hour that passes I am supposed to be a little more healed. That's how things are supposed to work right?
In reality I am not better, I'm worse. Every hour that goes by I am a little more enraged, a little more frustrated, a little more sad. Every hour that goes by I can't hold back the tears that threaten to spill at any given moment in the middle of mundane things. Every hour that goes by I realize how over this is...I get further away from the day I once had hope for this baby. I want to rewind things and have a different outcome. This is not fair.
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