Infertility

Infertility.  I let that word roll around in my mind and I reject it.  A woman who conceived a healthy child on the first cycle of trying doesn't have infertility.  Now that would be silly right?  A woman who can get pregnant can't be infertile.

Evidently not. 

Infertility is a word that has been haunting me in the last few months. . . .I can't be infertile.  I can't be seeing a doctor for infertility.  I can't be a woman who is probably going to undergo infertility treatments. 

Infertility.  I hate that word.  It doesn't really apply to me in the traditional sense of the word. . . .I can get pregnant.  I'm actually quite good at it and I've gotten pregnant in:

1 cycle with Jack

3 cycles with loss#1

3 cycles with loss #2

2 cycles with loss# 3

1 cycle with loss#4

1 cycle with loss#5 (pregnancy # 3, 4, and 5 were back to back)

So see?  I'm great at getting pregnant!  Infertile women can't get pregnant easily.

Yet I am still considered to have infertility. . . .subfertility? . . . .psuedoinfertility?. . . .lil-bit-of-infertility?. . . . (I'm making this shit up by now by the way).

There is no proper word for what I am. . . . my chart at the OB's office has habitual-aborter in it.  Now that is two lovely words right?  But if I told people I was a habitual-aborter I may get some funny looks so I say I am suffering from secondary infertility. . . .because it's easier. And less harsh than aborter.  And it's secondary because I have a primary child that was conceived without issue. 


So there. . . .infertility.  It still sounds wrong in my head.  If you would have asked me 1 year ago if I'd have that tag on my body I would have giggled and told you "I am not infertile". . . .I'm still kind of giggling at it even now.