that is the question.
After speaking with Dr. Hope about our options and our next steps the "C" word came up again. I originally was against going that route, or any route that involved fertility medicine. Of course that was "before" and now I am entering into the desperate-to-have-a-baby "after" stage. I kind of understand the use of clomid and I understand why she offered this option to me. It has something to do with improving my egg quality and also improving my luteal phase in order to sustain a healthy embryo....it also may have the unintended result of giving me too many eggs to fertilize and may result in twins. Which is NOT what I want or desire....not to mention I have a cervix that can't carry a single baby much less two at a time. I would be a high risk ticking time bomb with twins. If I get pregnant and stay pregnant with twins I will take it as a blessing and do all I can to carry them to as full term as I can, but I know it wouldn't be an easy road to hike. If my OB could read this now he'd be yelling "NO CLOMID" at the top of his lungs. It's Dr. Hope's job to get me pregnant and his job to KEEP me pregnant into the 2nd and 3rd trimester. Poor man.
I am just resistant to take it and I don't know why. I guess I just keep hoping that I can do this on my own and have a healthy baby. I keep thinking the next one will stick and grow and I won't lose it in the first few weeks.
I of course have been wrong.
I have a list of pros and cons and questions for Dr. Hope and I'll decide what I want to do. I have only a couple options; I can just keep doing unmedicated natural cycles with my aspirin, folgard and then progesterone supplementation and just see what happens, I can do clomid for a few cycles, I am researching into doing a gluten free diet but I'm only just learning about it or I can take a break...I have a feeling I'll just have another chemical pregnancy if I just do another natural cycle and I've already said a break isn't happening right now.
If anyone has any advice regarding clomid I'd love to hear it.
4 comments:
I'm on Clomid, but because my body wasn't ovulating on it's own... Your concerns are obviously different than mine are though, so it's going to be entirely up to you if you think you could handle the outcome if it were to be twins.
Stressful, no matter what, to have to "intervene", you know?
Thanks, I am just trying to mentally prepare myself to accept if we have twins and to forgive myself if I lose them due to my incompetent cervix. It's a very real possibility for me and that is so scary. I am afraid my desire to get pregnant with a healthy baby (or two) is wrongly overshadowing my fear of multiples. I am hoping that everything works out and I only produce one strong lead follicle. That may be just wishful thinking ;) And you are sooo right about it being stressful to intervene...I feel like I am messing with my cycle and I hate it. I am blessed to be able to ovulate on my own, it's just not a "good" ovulation.
Here from the TB and the 2IF board. I'm so sorry for your losses. I can't imagine. I haven't suffered loss, only can't get pregnant :( But it's all hard. Anyway, we are working on TTC #2 and while I have no incompetent cervix problems twins are just not ideal. Our first was a follistim (injectibles)/TI baby and we had only one mature follicle so twins were unlikely. Our daughter was born in July '09. If I was dead set against multiples this time, and/or had a health issue that would prevent me from successfully carrying them, I would elect to do IVF with a single embryo transfer - identical twins are still a risk but the risks are low. It sounds like ultimately you've decided on clomid and it may seem silly to go from ovulating regularly, getting pregnant easily but having repeated losses to IVF which is typically the last resort but it would address the "no twins" concern.
That's one of my questions for my RE and it has crossed my mind. Unfortunately IVF is not covered by my insurance :( Sorry for your trouble too, IF in all it's forms is so painful.
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